Episode 126: Negotiating with a Narcissist with Rebecca Zung

Rebecca Zung is one of the Top 1% of attorneys in the nation, author of bestselling books, including Negotiate Like You M.A.T.T.E.R, and host of the popular Negotiate Your Best Life. She is who many women turn to regarding all things narcissistic abuse and divorce.  I am thrilled to welcome Rebecca as a guest to talk about how to negotiate a divorce with a narcissist. In this episode, Rebecca and I discuss many topics including the differences between overt and covert narcissists and strategies for negotiating and disarming a narcissist.  Show Highlights Overt narcissists versus covert narcissists: An overt narcissist would be someone, like Donald Trump, who has no qualms about saying he's the greatest at everything. A covert narcissist is almost more insidious and dangerous because they know enough to hide it. (8:44) A narcissist will do whatever they can to keep their grip going. So you have to get out if you can, because it's the only way you'll have peace. (21:51) Rebecca reveals the biggest flaw that occurs when negotiating with a narcissist and what you should do, instead. (27:52) Why focusing on you, your case, your position, and your mindset, is so important. (34:11) Some strategies to disarm a narcissist. (35:50) The five key areas that most judges care about: property division, spousal support, custody, child support, and attorney fees. (48:08) Judges don’t view narcissism as a problem in divorce so if you want them to care about it, you must put it in terms that will make them care. (49:11)   Learn More About Rebecca: Rebecca Zung is one of the Top 1% of attorneys in the nation, having been recognized by U.S. News & World Report as a “Best Lawyer in America”, as “Legal Elite” by Trend Magazine, and recognized by her peers and the judiciary as AV(c), preeminent rated in family law, the highest possible rating for an attorney by Martindale Hubbell. But her journey wasn’t always easy. Married at 19 the first time, she had 3 children by the age of 23 and then was a divorced single mom when she decided to go back to law school. She went from being a single mom, college dropout, to becoming one the most powerful lawyers in the country at the helm of a multi-million dollar practice. She is now committed to sharing her secrets and empowering others to live their lives at their optimum level of success, professionally and personally. She is the author of the bestselling books, Negotiate Like You M.A.T.T.E.R.: The Sure Fire Method to Step Up and Win (foreword by Robert Shapiro) and Breaking Free: A Step-by-Step Divorce Guide for Achieving Emotional, Physical, and Spiritual Freedom, and is a sought after major media contributor. Her perspectives are in high demand by television and print outlets, as she has been featured in or on Extra, Forbes, Huffington Post, Newsweek, Time, Dr. Drew, NPR Talk Radio, Good Day New York and CBS Los Angeles among others. Now, Rebecca remains a partner in Long, Murphy & Zung, and is based in Los Angeles and Florida. She is continuing to serve through her incredible on-demand programs such as S.LA.Y. Your Negotiation With a Narcissist, and the Divorce Delete-Alt-Control Masterclasses. She is also the host of the popular show Negotiate Your Best Life™ which is available on YouTube and as a Top Podcast, and also is a frequent keynote speaker. Resources & Links: Show notes with links on the web at: https://kateanthony.com/podcast/negotiating-with-a-narcissist-with-rebecca-zung Rebecca’s websiteKate on Rebecca’s podcastRebecca on Facebook Rebecca on Instagram Rebecca on Twitter Rebecca’s Crush My Negotiation worksheet The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: Recognizing the Traits and Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological AbuseS.L.A.Y. Your Negotiation with a Narcissist (affiliate link)Donate to the Thrive Fund