88. Grieving Your Marriage and Processing Divorce. With Rebecca Feinglos

**This episode of How Not to Suck at Divorce is sponsored by Better Health. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/NOTSUCK and get on your way to being your best self.** Why is it that we don't allow ourselves to grieve the loss of a relationship?? It's time we change that. We are chatting with Rebecca Feinglos, founder of Grieve Leave, an organization that makes grieving death, divorce, job loss, etc more accessible and without the STIGMA.  Rebecca has experience grief of several levels. Yes, she's been through a divorce. She's also lost both of her parents. Her mother died when she was young and her father recently died on the first day of the COVID-19 lockdown. She ended her marriage one year after her father died. So what, actually, is grieving?? How do you grieve? Do you have to grieve? How do you know if you are grieving?? Can you grieve if you wanted the divorce?? (yes, of course) In divorce, we often will grieve the loss of what could have been...the life that we thought we were going to have...   And what about our jobs and bosses understanding how to support you in your grief process?? And while we're on the topic, let's debunk the myth of the "5 Stages of Grief".  Look, friends, this phrase comes from a study that was performed in the 1970's and was centered around cancer paitents.  As it turns out, there are NOT "stages" of grief that you go through and then you magically "finish" the grief process. Sorry... grief is not linear. It's up and down, side to side, and is ongoing. Not everyday will be gutwrentching, but there's not "finish line". And for this reason, Grieve Leave exists. Grieve Leave offers virtual support groups for people managing the grief process. There are many different types of groups and whole lot more insight, guidance and community available. Visit them at: https://www.grieveleave.com .  You can also find them on social media at: http:www.instagram.com/grieveleave And now, a word from our sponsors: Soberlink offers alcohol montitoring in the most discreet way with the highest technology. Visit: http://www.soberlink.com/notsuck Our Family Wizard is here to make coparenting EASIER (isn't that nice??) Visit http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck to get access to their newsletter.   Thanks for being here, friends. Remember, we are here to support you in any way we can. If you are considering divorce and would like to be in our private community to listen to our episodes without downloading them to your device: join us here: http://www.patreon.com/notquitereadyfordivorce And if you want to join our free Facebook community, head here: http://www.facebook.com/thehownottosuckatdivorcecommunity