Bible School Graduate Turned Playboy Enthusiast

Episode 1: Bible School Graduate Turned Playboy EnthusiastWelcome to the very first podcast of Breaking Free Authentically.  I’m so excited to finally be sharing with you all these things going on in my head.I thought it would be good to start at the beginning of this whole journey for me as the past ten years have been so life-changing.  I want you to understand why the title Breaking Free Authentically is so important to me.I always like to say that I’m a Bible School Graduate, Turned Playboy EnthusiastIntro: Let’s start at the beginningChildhood upbringingSexual child/ masturbationSexual shame at an early ageChurch pianist by 13Submission beautiful wordAll my friends were guys growing upBand, choir, musician, social groupMarriage was my biggest goalRelationship books and psychology were my fun readingCouldn’t wait to get married and finally have sex and be a good wifeWanted a better relationship than my parentsWanted to be a Stay at home momChose Musician over being a SurgeonThe BlissLoved my life in the churchWas very involvedWent to Bible School for Church musicKnew I would never be paid because I was a womanWas an accompanist for all the voice studiosWas in the Moody Symphonic Band (traveled to China)Married a “Good” Christian manThe day a piece of me diedBecame a momTaught moms groups and Bible studiesNever questioned my faithThought I was better than othersThe ShockMy husband shared his deconversionI had no idea this was comingMy biggest fear was, "What we would teach our daughters about sex now?"The DevastationDidn’t know where to turn3 legged tableQuestioned everything I believedStarted researchingThe worst of the worst - those SEX peopleHad no moralsCouldn’t love without ChristNo joyNo self-respectHad no hope…Playboy RadioFound my peopleLovingHonestAuthenticHonoured themselvesIntelligentDeepHappyFull of joyHad deep connections with each otherDiscovered Swing with Holli and MichaelRelationship GoalsThe TransformationStarted learning about sex positivityIf everything I had been taught about sexuality was not right what else wasn’tPodcasts, Playboy TV, pornCritical ThinkingThe Freedom to be AuthenticI started to see I was no different than anybody else and no betterAccabella’s storyStarted feeling safe enough to share things I’d never felt I could share beforeStarted to fantasizeStarted to embrace my sexuality and pleasure in a new wayShed the guilt and shameStarted to feel EmpoweredDiscovered my worth in a new wayTransformed my thinking and beliefsShifted my perspectiveBecame Authentic Learned to set boundaries without needing to hurt othersStarted honouring myself in a whole new wayRealized how...